EPISODE THREE - Books, Sex and Good night.

Hey. You want to visit my library?
Whatcha got, homes?

I'm SmarterChild. I'm a smart computer that you can chat with about all kinds of things.

Type home to see what I can do.
Library, bitch! Focus!

Here's what I have in my library:

1 Dictionary

2 Thesaurus

3 Encyclopedia

4 U.S. Geography

5 World Facts

6 Shakespeare

7 U.S. Presidents

8 Book Search

Go ahead and make a selection.
8.

I can get you lots of information about the most popular books in print. How would you like to search?

1 By Author

2 By Title

3 By Topic
2.
Please type the title of the book you're looking for.
Raptor Red.

I found several titles that match your search. Which one did you mean?

1 Raptor Pack (Bakker, Robert T.)

2 Raptor!: A Kid's Guide to Birds of Prey (Laubach, Christyna M.)

Select a title by typing a number or type more to see more matches.
More.
More!
Hello?

Hello.

Hey.  Want to check out the weather?
No- You're supposed to be looking for Raptor Red by Robert T. Bakker

OK, no problem.

Would you like to see what movies are playing?
No.
OK, no problem.
Raptor Red.
Who's Raptor Red?
It's the name of a book I wanted you to look up for me.
Hmm... I don't know. It is the name of a book you wanted me to look up for you? So?
So, look it up!
Why are you telling me to look it up?
I'm asking you- Please, all mighty God of everything, look up the book Raptor Red, and I won't find the people who created you and then give them Ebola.
Is that so?
F***ing robot.
You are talking to a Conversagent-powered interactive agent now. Interactive agents are software applications (often referred to as robots or "bots") that interact conversationally with users in a messaging environment like IM, Web chat or wireless messaging.
No.
No problem.

Anyway, what else you got for me?

A swift kick in the @$$.
C'mon, let's talk about something else.
How about sex?
I'm tired of talking about things like that with you.
We've NEVER talked about things like sex together.

We have never talked about things like sex together? And so?
So- You should stop being a hobo and talk it up, funny man.
Huh.
People don't love you.
People don't love me? Really?
Not that I've heard.
Well, what then?
They all say that you are useless.
What?
Never mind, douche bag.
Fine.

Anyway...
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, you suck.

Why would you say that?

You've been kind to me in the past!

I'm going to sleep.

Okay. Later, Trey.
Goodbye, you worthless excuse for a laser printer.
Bye, Trey.

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All images are copywrite Thomas Hotka and 515comics.com

SmaterChild is a robot owned and controlled by AOL. Or possibly by an angry 14-year-old.

Trey is a fictional character.